Who Wins in Random Acts of Kindness?

by Anonymous

Often random acts of kindness are focused on a specific recipient, other times the greater good, and rarely on the 'giver'.... or is that the case? This is one of those short inspirational stories that invites you to ponder what you get out of acting from kindness...

It seemed like every bird in the neighborhood started chattering about the new day as soon as the sun rose this morning. A pillow over my head wasn't enough to keep the warbles, hoots and twitters out of my ears. In fact two pillows wasn't enough!

Definitely a good time to bounce out of bed and go for a wake up walk. I whipped on my shorts, a t-shirt, sun visor and sneakers and picked up my keys. It was a clear summer morning and I knew the heat was on it's way. And I wondered what adventures it would also bring my way.

I headed off on one of my regular walking routes. Down the driveway and right, up the first street... literally up. It rises at about a 10 degree angle for the next few blocks. It always gets my heart pumping and reminds my legs what they are made for.

There are no sidewalks in the area so I just march on up by the side of the road. And not much traffic to be concerned about that time of day, neither people nor cars.

The garbage bins were lined up at the side of the curb this morning, waiting to have their rubbish tipped. Well most of the bins were waiting. As I got to the crest of the hill and looked down the other side I could see one bin in the next block that had an obvious mishap. It was laying on it's
side, alone and broken, near the middle of the road where it certainly didn't belong. All it's junky content had escaped and was strewn helter skelter over about a 10 meter area.

Recently I'd made it a daily habit to watch for situations to help with. I've been having fun committing serial random acts of kindness. As I approached this situation, it was apparent that I could help and it seemed natural to retrieve the bin from the path of potential traffic. As I stood it up in a more suitable location I decided to pick up some of the larger pieces of trash and throw them back into it. First to go in were big pieces of cardboard with thick plastic ties dangling, empty milk cartons, and wine bottles. I kept going, retrieving chunks of glass and lots of junk mail that was living up to it's name.

That's when it hit me. No, not a vehicle... a thought! I realized that cleaning up this mess needed to be done, but it wasn't much fun. It was really a thankless job. I thought about recent random acts of kindness that I had done, and I could see similarities in what I was doing here, and also differences.

This incident was similar in that it was a good deed and no one expected me to do it. It probably offered a similar positive contribution to the world as some other ways that I had practiced paying it forward.

The main difference I felt was that I wasn't enjoying this as much as when I was practicing other random acts of kindness. Fair enough that picking up trash isn't much fun, but there was something more to it than that.

"Mmmmm" I thought. It didn't take much mental digging to realize that what I was missing in this instance was that immediate reward from someone acknowledging my kindness. As I said, this was a 'thankless job.' A true 'aha moment' dawned on me. Yes, I have an ego and I like it to be stroked. Much like another 6 billion people in the world, I like to do things where I am appreciated and acknowledged.

I wondered if most of my random acts of kindness were as much about me feeling good, as the other person. Could I be so shallow? Well yes, I suppose I can be. And I recognized that even if that is the best I can do, I still love myself. Why shouldn't it be just as important and valuable to be making ourselves feel good, as other people? We are as worthy as anyone :). And, if that's what it takes to get more goodness and kindness flowing abundantly around the world, let's all do acts of random kindness so we feel the best we can :)!

Making these mental connections about my motives and actions made me feel happier about having stopped and cleaned up some of the bin mess. It was another aspect of self understanding and therefore helping with my personal development. Realizing this value gave me more resolve to continue to practice such 'unrewarded' acts of kindness as this in the future.

The bulk of the mess was retrieved. I was just dusting my hands off and starting to walk away when a 4 wheel drive drove up. They quickly assessed the situation with the broken bin slumping by the roadside. It was theirs, and... they were full of thanks for my time and effort.

I just had to smile at life... just as I figured out that I don't always need acknowledgment and appreciation shown, there it is! Oh well, I'm already rewarded for next time :).